I gave my presentation entitled “Where are the Asexual Voices” at C2E2 this past Friday. I’m not going to lie, I was terrified. I was positively terrified about giving this performance (and had a couple of near chickening out moments in the week leading up to the convention). Thankfully, I had some lovely friends in the audience and seeing their faces reminded me of my own courage. Suddenly, the daunting task before me wasn’t quite so scary anymore.
Even though I can’t remember a lot of specifics, this presentation proved to be quite a liberating experience. Many people are aware of my background and my “closet years.” I have spoken candidly about the amount of toxic friendships I’ve had in the past, when I was a self-hating ace. It took me years before I was able to embrace my asexuality. I went through hell and back to get to where I am today.
This presentation felt like my way of reiterating that only I define me. I am allowed to love myself, to feel pride in my asexuality and my art. I am asexual and I am an artist. I’m not anyone’s science experiment or teaching moment or cookie provider. I am a goddamn strong feminist (the aro-ace feminist avenger) and I own my narrative.
And now, I have to go back to doing what I love: working on my novel 🙂